The Ultimate Good Guy
Think about these kind of people: rednecks, engineers, athletes, parents. How do you know they are those thing? What do they look like? Sound like? What do they talk about? How do they act? We are going to look at how to identify the “Good Guys” according to Paul.
Identify the Good Guys
Here is a trustworthy saying: Whoever aspires to be an overseer desires a noble task. Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect.
(1 Timothy 3:1-4)
What do those who are aspiring to be overseers aspiring to? They are aspiring to a noble task, serving others, holding them accountable, and looking out for the church. These guys are made good because of the love they have received from God and they want to share that with others and see others do good.
(If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?) He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceited and fall under the same judgment as the devil. He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap.
(1 Timothy 3:5-7)
The author has now laid out his full list of how these men should act, what they look like, talk about, what their character is deep down and on the surface.
They are: above reproach, can’t lay hands on him, he is not faulted with anything on the list that Paul gives. He doesn’t cheat or look at porn, doesn’t get in bar fights or otherwise, doesn’t even get drunk, he doesn’t care more about his job and making money than he does his family. What do these things have in common? They have to do with his character, who he is at his core. Many people say character is who you are when no one is watching. It doesn’t say that he is nice sometimes, or just a really good teacher, but kind of a jerk otherwise. NO! Paul says, if anyone wants to be an elder/overseer/leader it can’t be because he’s selfish and wants others to think good stuff about him. It has to be because has he Jesus on the inside and looks like Jesus on the outside. Paul redefines what it means to be a good leader. Many of us are old enough recognize people’s character. Think of your father, your coach, your friend, one of your elders, your friend’s dad, your boss, your pastor, do they have Christian character? Hopefully, you can answer ‘yes’, but we know these men fail sometimes. The devil wants to trap us in sin, but Jesus provides an escape. When those who are overseeing the church fail, we have to remember that they are sinners in need of God’s grace and protection just like us. When we fall into the traps of sin, God wants to show us grace so that we might strive to share Him with outsiders. We, as believers, should be known for our good actions and characters.
I encourage you to surround yourself with people who fit this list. In your day-to-day life you may not always get to choose who you “follow”, but you can choose who you model yourself after. Paul here is addressing leaders and elders of the church, but as teenagers you can still model what Paul tells us leaders should be like.
Later, Paul tells Timothy not to let other people look down on him because he is young. I encourage you all to be the good guys! When people see us they should be able to identify us as the good guys. My dad is a good guy. He never really raises his voice, he and my mom are generous always trying to help people get jobs. They’re hospitable, always welcoming people into their home and making them feel like family. I’ve never seen them drink too much, or be unkind to anyone. When I was in high school, my grandmother moved in with us. It took a pretty big toll on my family. We couldn’t all leave the house at the same time, I had some attitude problems with that, my parents started fighting more than ever before, they no longer attended church together, or small group- it was pretty clear that there was a strain on our family. My dad took Paul’s letter seriously. He knew that he had to care well for our family before he could even begin to care well for our church family. He stepped down as an elder for a time. When it happened it felt like he was quitting, as I got older I realized he was following God’s Word. He was putting Jesus first and caring for the family God gave Him; through that, we were able to care better for our church family. I’ve identified my parents as “good guys”. They are a good example to follow, because they model Jesus.
Follow the Good Guys
In the same way, deacons are to be worthy of respect, sincere, not indulging in much wine, and not pursuing dishonest gain. They must keep hold of the deep truths of the faith with a clear conscience. They must first be tested; and then if there is nothing against them, let them serve as deacons. In the same way, the women are to be worthy of respect, not malicious talkers but temperate and trustworthy in everything. A deacon must be faithful to his wife and must manage his children and his household well.
(1 Timothy 3:8-12)
In the Acts of God’s appointed apostles (those who knew and followed Jesus), it is recorded that some of the church members weren’t being taken care of (specifically widows). They remedied this by:
“Gathering all the disciples together and said, “It would not be right for us to neglect the ministry of the word of God in order to wait on tables. 3 Brothers and sisters, choose seven men from among you who are known to be full of the Spirit and wisdom. We will turn this responsibility over to them 4 and will give our attention to prayer and the ministry of the word.”
(Acts 6:2-4).
They chose men because of how they dressed? No. How they spoke? No. How funny they were? No, they chose men who were full of the Spirit. Men who would be the example for deacons for the church ages to come. Deacon in greek means servant. The message translates vs 8 as they aren’t in it for what they can get out of it. If you want to be a leader in the church, you have to be a servant. Jesus Himself said He came not to be served, but to serve and He proved that to be true. How? In the same way, Christians today should be worthy of respect, holding onto the “deep truths” or mysteries of faith. The thing that has been revealed only to those who believe in Jesus is the truth that: Jesus as God came to earth to serve, save, and lead us to salvation by defeating sin and death. Those of us who believe this are called to serve others.
Deacons are followers of Jesus, they follow a Good God and as they do, they become “Good Guys” for us to follow. At some churches, deacons are the ones who make sure the youth room stays up to date, in the church I grew up in they were the guys who always picked up chairs, but there is so much more that they do that we don’t see. They are the silent leaders, the lead by example leaders.
In college it was easy to serve, I would help put things up after practice, tie Morgana and Liz’s cleats, drive teammates to doctor’s appointments. There were a lot of ways to serve, but doing these things didn’t make me feel like a leader. By my last year, I was the only person who had been involved with the team for 4 years. I thought people hadn’t seen me do anything good. I wasn’t a starter, I wasn’t that great in practice either, so I thought I wasn’t a leader.
My new coach pulled me aside and said “Kent, you’re going to be captain this year whether you get playing time or not.”
“Why?” I asked him, what point is it to have a captain on the bench ya know?
“Because you’re a leader.” Without realizing it, I had gathered a following of teammates. They respected me, they copied what I did, freshmen came in and the girls were welcoming, they cleaned up after practice together, they drove each other to doctors appointments and studied together. I wasn’t a leader because everyone thought I was cool or good at soccer, I was a leader because I served and that made other people want to do the same. It’s hard for me to do that, because my pride gets in the way. I want to be recognized, I want people to serve me back. I want to receive rewards and recognitions at times. I want people to think I’m a good guy. But it isn’t about me being a good guy, it is about me following our good God. When we follow Him, we become the “Good Guys”.
Be the Good Guys
Those who have served well gain an excellent standing and great assurance in their faith in Christ Jesus.
(1 Timothy 3:13)
Like overseers and deacons, we shouldn’t be good guys for what we can get out of it, but it’s still a pretty sweet deal. You gain a whole lot by having faith in Jesus. It isn’t the strength of your faith that saves you, it isn’t being a good guy that saves you, it is Jesus Christ who saves you. You get the choice every day if you want to follow Him or not. Decide to follow Him, decide to model Him. He is the: who, why, and how of being a servant leader. He is The Overseer, of the church He came to serve, he cares for His bride and His children. He provided wine at a wedding, He never got drunk, He flipped tables in the temple, but He never fought, He was hated by the Pharisees but had a good reputation with outsiders, they said terrible things about Him, but none of it was true, He called people out for their sin, but He never spoke ill about them, He was tested by the devil, time and time again, but He proved Himself trustworthy of your love and respect.
Jesus never failed. The church does, the church in Ephesus was failing and Paul wrote to remind them that if they want to be good leaders, overseers, shepherds, deacons, then they first needed to look at Jesus. When leaders around you are failing you, look at Jesus. Identify Him as the Good guy, follow Him, and model Him.
